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Growing Yourself Back Up, by John Lee
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Someone pushes your buttons . . . you feel rage . . . fear . . . sweaty palms . . . unbidden tears . . . you feel like a kid . . .
We've all experienced moments when we lose control of a situation and ourselves. Now, in Growing Yourself Back Up, the first book to explain the idea of emotional regression to the general reader, bestselling author John Lee identifies the circumstances that cause these seemingly uncontrollable feelings and shows how they are directly tied to our experience as children.
No adult, explains Lee, need ever experience the helpless feelings of childhood again. Here are his proven methods and visualization exercises, developed in his popular workshops, for recognizing, preventing, and diffusing regression in ourselves and others. He teaches, for example, that adults cannot be abandoned, they can only be left; if we're feeling abandoned we're regressing. He also reminds us that no matter how overwhelmed we are, adults always have options; if we believe we don't, we're in a regression.
Growing Yourself Back Up will show you how to:
* develop strong emotional boundaries and convey them to others
* learn the Detour Method that reverses regression
* confront without regressing
* communicate with the authority figures who push your buttons
* minimize regression at family functions
Lee offers hope--as well as practical strategies that work--for conquering those childlike feelings of powerlessness that are almost always rooted in regression.
- Sales Rank: #33182 in Books
- Published on: 2001-01-23
- Released on: 2001-01-23
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 8.00" h x .57" w x 5.20" l, .44 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 240 pages
From the Inside Flap
Someone pushes your buttons . . . you feel rage . . . fear . . . sweaty palms . . . unbidden tears . . . you feel like a kid . . .
We've all experienced moments when we lose control of a situation and ourselves. Now, in "Growing Yourself Back Up, the first book to explain the idea of emotional regression to the general reader, bestselling author John Lee identifies the circumstances that cause these seemingly uncontrollable feelings and shows how they are directly tied to our experience as children.
No adult, explains Lee, need ever experience the helpless feelings of childhood again. Here are his proven methods and visualization exercises, developed in his popular workshops, for recognizing, preventing, and diffusing regression in ourselves and others. He teaches, for example, that adults cannot be abandoned, they can only be left; if we're feeling abandoned we're regressing. He also reminds us that no matter how overwhelmed we are, adults always have options; if we believe we don't, we're in a regression.
"Growing Yourself Back Up will show you how to:
* develop strong emotional boundaries and convey them to others
* learn the Detour Method that reverses regression
* confront without regressing
* communicate with the authority figures who push your buttons
* minimize regression at family functions
Lee offers hope--as well as practical strategies that work--for conquering those childlike feelings of powerlessness that are almost always rooted in regression.
About the Author
John Lee is the author of the bestselling Flying Boy series, as well as Facing the Fire: Experiencing and Expressing Anger Appropriately and Writing from the Body. He lives in Woodstock, Georgia, with his wife, Susan, and conducts workshops around the country.
Most helpful customer reviews
4 of 4 people found the following review helpful.
clearly and understand others more fully. WI would recommend this book to anyone trying to be a better fuctioning adult. If yo
By angela marie
I would recommend this book to anyone trying to be a better fuctioning adult. If you interact with other adults or children. If you are trying to improve or give closure to a relationship. If you want to be a better employee or boss , a better teacher or student . This book put a certain perspective back in focus for me and is helping me communicate more clearly and understand others more fully.
6 of 6 people found the following review helpful.
A Gift to Everyone Who Wants to Release Negative Patterns!
By BrockWalsh
I'm an anthropologist and also fellow Southerner, like the author, who moved across country at age 18 to get out of a quite dysfunctional household and has been on a long spiritual path since then to release the negative patterns I grew up with. I just read this book, Growing Yourself Back Up, this past month and it has immensely changed my life. I learned about the book from life coach Cheryl Richardson's radio show on Hay House Radio, when she mentioned it to a caller with abandonment issues. Not only has the book made me more compassionate towards myself, but it has also made me more compassionate towards my parents without necessarily excusing their behavior or mine. Moreover, I feel it will help me in my new career journey. I will soon be working with and advising young undergraduate researchers, many of who also, from my past experiences as a teaching assistant, have had the effect of pulling me into a regression zone. Thus, I really appreciated the chapter that the author added for the helping professions. Finally, I can already see how it has made me more compassionate to myself in regards to my relationship with my partner (who happens to be the youngest of five, so there's a lot of young child energy with my middle child energy, haha). The book's particular section on always remembering that adults have choices in staying in relationships was, perhaps, a major relief in this sense, as well as the idea that I can always excuse myself for a moment when I am angry, use that time to punch a pillow or walk around the lake, and then return to any discussion. This was especially important for me because we just finished a two-year stint of a long-distance relationship because of a postdoc I had after graduate school, and the stress and exhaustion from the situation (esp. travel) did produce major moments of regression on both our parts.
That said, this book is a true gift to the world. It's definitely a book I am going to re-read and study many times. I will also integrate it in my mentoring with undergraduates. From my own experience, I've found that research is one of those stressful processes that can definitely trigger regression for both students and faculty (many of who are also big kids, as we know). Thus, thank you again, Dr. Lee, for this great book.
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful.
MUST READ for ALL Those in Relationships or Even Considering Them!!!
By Jill Maxwell
EVERY married and engaged couple needs to read this book! OK, actually, every PERSON even considering a relationship needs to read this book. Thanks to Coach Daune Thompson for recommending and to John Lee for writing! Wish this had been around a looong time ago!!!
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